Here is a list of 15 things that nobody talks about regarding having a newborn. The only thing I could focus on when I was pregnant was the birth. I had no idea how much my life would change, especially in the first six weeks.
Everybody talks about the baby bliss! Nobody talks about the nitty gritty issues. So here it goes…
1. You will be in bed most of the day and night feeding your baby or resting. I really had no idea how much a baby could eat and how often until I met my little one. She ate about every two to three hours for about 40 minutes 24 hours a day. This didn’t leave time for much else.
2. You have nothing else to do except love your newborn. Seems easy and incredibly obvious until your mind begins to swirl with all the crap you think you need to get done. I am really active person so the idea of “not doing” anything was hard for me. I kept thinking about housework or going to yoga. The only thing I really had to do was love her unconditionally. 3. The laundry train will hit your house. Choo choo!! So climb aboard. I have no idea how, but the laundry loads have seemed to double since my baby was born and have not stopped since.
4. You may feel very isolated. Staying home taking care of an infant is new territory and doing this in a society that promotes self reliance doesn’t make it any easier. When I had my baby I entered into this odd dimension of craving space from everyone yet feeling very isolated when others were not around. This was the first time in my life that I wished I was living in a commune. Yes, a full on commune.
5. Sleep when the baby sleeps. The temptation to jump up and complete the hundred things you have been meaning to do during that 20 minutes of freedom is so very tempting. But don’t, just rest. Your peace of mind and lack of exhaustion is so much more important in the long run.
6. A lot of people will tell you a lot of advice that you may or may not want to hear. They think they know how to do just about everything with the baby and will even demonstrate these talents. It’s fine to ignore them. Try not to let advice from others get on your nerves, or the people for that matter.
7. You don’t have to share your baby with everyone. Just pick a select few. There is no reason for your baby to be continuously passed around. If someone wants to offer help – ask them to bring you dinner or clean the house. Then politely ask them to leave if that is what makes you more comfortable.
8. Wear your baby for the first two to three months. Sounds hard and crazy but it now seems like the most practical way of properly caring for an infant. It was way more energy to try to keep her contented while I did things around the house.
9. You will probably do all the things you said you would never do once you have a baby. I said I would never co-sleep. I said I would never talk baby talk or fill my house with stuffed animals, toys, and swings. I also said I would never be that damn bag lady who carries all her emergency supplies around. I went against all my “I’ll nevers…” damn fast.
10. If you have a vaginal birth your perineum will feel incredibly bruised. At least mine did! I could not sit directly down for an entire week. It really hurt. Like a lot.
11. You will feel like a milk machine. Your boobs will get bigger than you ever thought possible…Ever. Plus you will show them to more people than you ever wanted to.
12. You will not always feel like a drippy milky mess. I felt incredibly unsexy at times. On top of being a milk machine dripping through t-shirts I also still had a very curvy figure and a full stomach. The weight eventually came off, but not necessarily at the pace I imagined.
13. You will fight with your spouse. And they will most likely be incredibly odd fights about nothing at all. Energy is high and emotions are crazy.
14. You will cry. But you will also smile all the time because your baby is one of the most beautiful creations you have ever seen. Ride the wave.
15. At some point, usually between three to six months, something switches. Either the baby gets easier or you can handle your shit…whatever it is, tasks get easier. You are able to leave the house smoothly. You sleep for longer periods. You get stuff done! Plus you feel a type of peace, happiness and love that no one can describe to you until you have a child yourself. That is when you basically forget all the stuff I wrote about above and you say to yourself…I could do this again.